Making Creativity a Priority

Making Space for Me

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Do you ever feel as if there isn’t space for you?

Often times I feel that I am so generous giving of my time and energy and physical space to others that it can appear there isn’t much left for me. I remember I went to a seminar one time and a woman arrived late and was looking around for a seat so I made room so she could sit next to me. Later she continual asked that I move my chair over so she had more room. So much so that if I moved any more I would be out in the aisle and I finally had to very firmly tell her no.

I often feel I have to hold boundaries. That my generosity is often met by others with a grab it before it’s gone type mentality until I feel I have been plucked clean of any space I had. What’s interesting is when I realize how much time and energy I spend making sure everyone has what they need-but me.

I mentioned in Monday’s post how I am recovering and resting. I have been longing to paint and it just felt like something I couldn’t do. Tonight I was watching an art class and I so wanted to take part but when I looked over I saw my desk was covered with all sorts of odds and ends.

I had no space to create.

And while I didn’t think I would paint I realized that as long as the desk was covered I wasn’t going to paint so I got up and cleared away the mess. It took maybe 15 minutes and my desk was clean and ready to use whenever I felt the urge to paint. I also found a scrap of paper that inspired me to make a random collage journal and a journal I had made a few months back that would be perfect for it!

Then I decided to sit down and paint. It was a short session while the kids got ready for bed but it was time for me. It was spaciousness that I gave myself as a gift. Just before I wrote this post I sat down for some more art time and I can already feel myself restoring from the gift of making space for myself. I am still working on the piece but I will share a photo here when it’s all done.

What can you do to make space for yourself? Is there something you can do to make things easier so when you are inspired to create you can just get down to the fun part? I would love to hear.

Until next time…

-Michele, aka The Dreaming Dilettante

Resting, Recharging and NaNoWriMo Wrap Up

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How are you? I hope this post is finding you well and that (if you celebrate) you had a wonderful Thanksgiving. We had a very nice visit with my husband’s family. It was gorgeous weather here on the East Coast and the kids were able to spend time with their cousins which is always a highlight for them.

On Saturday we went to a local Christmas parade which has become a yearly tradition for us. We started it when my oldest was only 1 and have been going every year and really enjoy it. I admit to feeling completely wiped out but as this was the first year my youngest was going to really watch the parade I didn’t want to miss it and I am so glad I went. It was a fun time for us all.

I have also been keeping up with my NaNoWriMo challenge and if all goes well I should reach my word count on November 30th. I will be sure to let you know how I make out!

Now, I rest. Now I work on recharging. I love doing things and being around people but afterwards I need my cocoon time. To curl up, be cozy and not have to speak or talk or listen much. To just be and reconnect.

I missed my art journals. I want to play with paper and paint and make a mixed media mess but I just didn’t have the energy today. I also wanted to write a fantastic blog post complete with video and again, just didn’t have the energy so I thought I would just stop by and say hello to you and share a small sketch I made in bed while listening to my favorite podcast

It felt good to make a small amount of time for those activities that are just for me. To honor those things I love so much and to make time for myself in a way that is just for me. There is so much I want to do and so many things I want to accomplish but I have to remind myself that it’s never the accomplishment that matters-it’s the experiences we have.

I hope you are taking care of yourself today in a way that is special just for you.

Until next time…

-Michele, aka The Dreaming Dilettante

Claiming Your Creativity

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I am currently running on a wave of creative energy. Today I am working on a fairly in-depth project here at Dreaming Dilettante and as a part of that project I wanted to write a bit about how I started to not only make time for my creativity but to claim the time and how that made such a difference for me.

Before I go into claiming my creativity I wanted to share a realization I had. I have never in my life used the word “career” referring to myself and/or my own work. I spoke of jobs and work but never career. The realization was a bit of an eye-opener for me because I realized that I never felt any work I did before (for which I received a paycheck) was a career. They were always place holders for that thing I was eventually going to do. More recently though I didn’t feel I could use the word career because it can’t be that big of thing if you aren’t being paid for it right? If you aren’t receiving a paycheck regularly then it’s not a career or a job right?

So what is it?

When I decided to claim the weekend mornings for my creativity I shared the idea with my husband who thought it was a great idea (he’s kinda awesome). As I was talking about this idea of claiming the weekends I was able to see where my own personal blocks had been in really owning my creative time.

You see, I didn’t think I could make time for my creativity because I wasn’t being paid for it. How could I justify taking time each day just for my art? Now there is probably 3 books worth of delving into why I felt like that but suffice to say I just decided that was all kinda crap and I’m not going to think like that anymore. To help me along the way I was gifted with the realization that before any amazing creative was getting paid anything for their amazing creativity they, well, weren’t getting paid, but they still were being creative.

You have to write a book before you can get an agent and/or a publishing contract. So before any great writer was a published, getting paid great writer they were telling friends and family “sorry I’m writing, can’t.” At least I imagine they did. Or perhaps they squirreled away in the wee hours of the night writing secretly by candlelight.

Either way they made time to do the thing they loved to do simply because they loved to do it.

I realized that even if I never make a penny from all my creative endeavors I still love them. I still want to do them. Elizabeth Gilbert in her book “Big Magic” said she never asked anything from her writing she just showed up. I think that’s beautiful and it made me think of all the things I asked of my writing before I even gave it my full attention. How I begged it to give me a publishing contract so I could get out of that job before I even dedicated daily attention to the act of writing.

I was thinking of selling my art long before I connected with the essence of my art. Long before I really fell in love with making my art.

It was a bit like going on 2 dates with someone and asking for their undying loyalty and devotion when all you had done was have 2 meals with them and decide you kinda liked them.

My creativity deserves so much more than that. It deserves more than my taking time for it, more than me squeezing in a few stolen moments here and there.

It deserves my full devotion. In fact, when you find that thing you love to do. The one you would do whether or not you earned money from it. It’s more than a career or a job even if it pays you boatloads of money. That thing that’s not a career and not a job? It’s purpose. It’s the whole reason your soul hopped aboard this human ride. It deserves claiming.

So I claimed the weekend mornings. On the weekends for 3-4 hours I do my creative thing. I am in my tiny studio space, I light some incense (which really helps set the tone and creative energy) and I sit down and I play. I start with playing never with the intention of finishing anything or making anything. I just play with things that look like fun to play with. My first weekend I made cardboard buttons, air dry clay stars, a wooden 8×8 painting of a girl my son thinks is me, a new journal cover, set up a new journal and began the cover for one of my energy journals. I also slapped down a lot of paint in my sketchbooks and journals and overall just really had a great time.

For me, “taking time” feels like something I am stealing away with. I am taking time out or taking time with-it almost feels like I am pulling from one place and putting it somewhere else. “Claiming” the time feels powerful and strong and like I am declaring this space as my own. It just feels better.

I will be honest, I do hope to one day receive money for the work I do. I would love nothing more than to retire my husband and spend my days making art, sharing art, inspiring others to make and share art and making some money while I’m at it.

For now however I am going to spend some time getting to know my creativity. Take her out on some mini-adventures, maybe some dinners and really get to know who she is without making any demands of her-or myself. Right now we just want to play, get to know each other and have fun.

Here’s to courting our creativity.

Until next time…

-Michele aka The Dreaming Dilettante