Tired Creativity

Making time for our creativity is something I think we can all struggle with. Often when we have the time we don’t have the energy and when we have the energy may be committed to other things such as job, family or just doing laundry.

I have often found myself in this cycle of needing, really needing to spend time with my art. I long to sit in my creative corner and paint or collage and to just get lost in the art of creating. More often than not the only time I have to do this is at the end of the day and the end of the day finds me tired. And usually it’s more than tired it’s the drain that comes with taking care of others all day with little focused energy on yourself. Or perhaps it’s the drain of spending your days focused on work that isn’t your passion-or worse-work that you really dislike doing.

It’s always surprising to me how often I put off that which I know I love most. The practices that make me smile or even better sigh with pure, unadulterated joy, are the ones that I put off the most and my creativity is no exception.

I do however pay attention. I take note of the habits and thoughts that run around in my brain. I try my best to be conscious of the choices I am making in each moment and it’s the times when I engage with my creativity that I noticed something you may have also experienced.

Creativity fuels me.

Creativity heals me.

Creativity releases the toxins, the sadness, the pain and it refills me with joy, truth and love.

It takes mere moments of me putting some color on a simple journal page for me to feel the calibration starting to happen. My energy raises, my mood lightens and I am rewarded by a feeling of rejuvenation I would not have thought possible a mere 5 minutes earlier.

I’ve spent my whole adult life trying to make time for my creativity when in reality I wanted to find time when I was at my best, fully awake and ready to go. I wanted hours upon hours of creative time. I wanted my creative time to be as long as-if not longer-than the time I spent at the day job.

Here’s what I have discovered about the beauty of creativity.

It’s there to heal us creatives. It is what keeps us moving through life, what keeps us reaching for the unconventional, the new, the non-mainstream. Creativity, unlike the day job, doesn’t demand from us our best. Instead it is like a loving grandmother, arms outstretched providing us with a safe place to rest. A place where we can dump all the hard and the taxing and leave with all that is bright, inspiring and real.

Instead of seeking ways to make time for my creativity, I challenge myself to just sit down at my workspace even if it’s with a cup of tea, feeling exhausted and completely lacking in inspiration. I might pick up a favorite material (current my Tempera paint sticks are my most favorite-so much fun for adding layers to a journal) and a simple composition notebook and just put some color on some paper. I am not seeking to make a masterpiece-or even to make anything at all. Instead I simply want to be with my creativity. To sit together, connect and just be. I start with a goal of 5 minutes. 5 minutes I sit there and doodle, scribble, paint or glue scraps to paper.

Almost every time I feel the energy flow in. I start to sit up straighter, smile maybe a bit and before I know it I am creating where just minutes before I was too exhausted to make myself some toast.

Creativity is a magical gift. It is there for you and you only need to knock on its door to feel the rewards. A Creative practice isn’t something that needs to be big or thought out-it is after all practice. You simply visit with it each day-and on the days when you want to skip it remind yourself that it’s then you need it most. It is the moments when you are lost, tired, sad, scared, frustrated that you need your creativity.

And it is always there for you.

Until next time…

-Michele, aka The Dreaming Dilettante