My natural state tends to be not getting the standards that most people take for granted. I never really identified myself as a rebel believing that rebels were these badass rule breakers and I generally just wanted to live where rules weren’t necessary because everyone that lived there were sovereign, intelligent individuals who took ownership for their own experiences thus making rules unnecessary and frankly, insulting.
When I was a child I realized that I just didn’t fall into the general “kid” category. There were assumptions made about kids that always used to make me groan inside. Like how every birthday party had pizza because “kids love pizza.” I hated pizza actually and to this day don’t really consider it a meal. I like white pizza with broccoli but pretty sure that still puts me in the “doesn’t like pizza” category.
I hated field day, Halloween parades and pretty much any organized activity of “fun” that’s purpose was to give us a break in our day and allow us to do those things kids like to do. Firstly, I hated anything that kept score or had winners. Not because I am competitive but because I am totally the opposite and could care less really. Plus, I hate organized activities. They are created with the idea of everyone having fun and all I really heard was a bunch of adults telling us what we can and cannot do which, well, wasn’t much fun. In addition by the time I was middle school age I had mastered the ability to be physically present but mentally off wandering with the unicorns when the present didn’t interest me so when you made me move my physical body around in a relay race (I can barely type those words without cringing) it was harder to stay in unicorn land. This ultimately forced me to face the reality that I was running around orange cones with a bunch of kids yelling at me because I wasn’t running fast enough.
As an adult and teen I would seek people who thought like me. I figured there had to be other kids that really, really hated the music coming out of Seattle in the 90’s (hint-there weren’t or at least they weren’t sharing) or adults who just hated going to tourist traps for vacation or who absolutely hated taking their kids to playgrounds.
Now of course, there are people who feel like I do in many ways. One of the reasons I write this blog is to reach out to those like myself who feel that the mainstream accepted behaviors make absolutely no sense what-so-ever (can we really talk about the holidays?). I do however believe that we may be scattered far and wide so that we can offer a differing opinion and alternative way of viewing the world but that solitude and lack of others like you can feel isolating.
The examples I have used in this post are superficial and for those of us that really see things for what are the differences we experience are on a much deeper level. It is that noticing of how the norm isn’t normal for everyone that makes us feel isolated but also holds our superpowers.
So if you are someone who sees things differently, who doesn’t have fun in the ways everyone else seems to have fun (I’m a Jersey Girl who hates the shore) I want you to know that you aren’t alone. Your vision and way of seeing the world is needed, valued and most of all needs you to honor it. We are here to create a new reality so be you, do your thing and spread fun, joy, and light in your own way.
Until next time…
-Michele, aka The Dreaming Dilettante